January 2017 Featured Volunteer: Mamel Vicencio

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TRF’s Volunteer of the Month for January 2017 is Carmel “Mamel” Vicencio!

Mamel is a nurse by education but a teacher and a creative at heart. She shares her many talents with TRF, including (but not limited to!) writing, teaching, marketing, & her knowledge and skills as a nurse. We are so grateful for her passion and help.

Q&A with MAMEL

How did you come to volunteer for TRF?

I came to TRF from the suggestion of my then doctor. She knew that, despite the unwillingness of practicing my profession (as a nurse), my heart still cares for the elderly. I saw that TRF brings relief mostly to their age group, so I went.

What were your expectations as a volunteer?

When I answered the online application form, I put a mark on anything I thought I could offer as a service. I was eager to receive a call. In short, I wasn’t as nervous… until the first day of joining the home visit! I cringed each time I thought I wasn’t qualified for any nursing functionality, but the good thing was, I wasn’t treated just as an accessory. I was with Nurse Mitch for my first encounter, and I felt welcomed like a colleague.

Describe the activities you volunteered for. Why did you choose them?

I volunteered for mostly office work. I did marketing, clerical work, anything artistic; and even “happy room”. I chose to volunteer for those because they’re what I love doing… anything except providing nursing care.

The funny thing here is, I actually scrapped nursing as a skill until Ms. Iso (the volunteer coordinator) oriented me. Walang takas! But, look where I am now — feeling fulfilled from my home visits!

How has the experience changed your life? What are your key reflections/lessons?

I will never get tired of learning that happiness comes from the mere action of being kind. Having Bipolar Disorder II, the ratio of good days to bad is 2 or 3 out of 40 — but my number of good days are growing. Days with TRF are happier; I am happier. TRF and their patients may need me, but I am the one who needs their service more!

Thank you Mamel!

10 Popular Father’s Day Sayings

Compiled by Niki Guloy

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There are hundreds of internet quotes that try to capture what a father is. We share a few of them here that remind us how a father’s impact shows not just through an inspirational sentence, but through his actions. His love shines in what he does for the people he calls his sons and daughters. A very happy Fathers Day to all the dads out there.

1. By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he’s wrong. – Charles Wadsworth

2. Any man can be a father, but it takes someone special to be a dad. – Anne Geddes

3. A truly rich man is one whose children run into his arms when his hands are empty.

4. It doesn’t matter who my father was; it matters who I remember he was. – Anne Sexton

5. It is easier for a father to have children than for children to have a real father. – Pope John XXIII

6. A father is a banker provided by nature. – French proverb

7. You know, fathers just have a way of putting everything together. – Erika Cosby

8. The greatest gift I ever had came from God: I call him dad!

9. A father carries pictures where his money used to be.

10. Once a father overheard his son pray: “Dear God, make me the kind of man my daddy is.” Later that night, the father prayed: “Dear God, make me the kind of man my son wants me to be.”

#MyMotherSaid: A Mother’s Day Tribute

Moms say memorable things to their kids. Sometimes it’s funny, sometimes it’s strange. Often, it’s strict. But pretty much always, it’s in love. This past weekend, we honored the timeless wisdom of moms by featuring some of the best advice our friend’s mothers had to offer. We asked some of our friends for quotable quotes from their mentors and guardians. Here are some of the helpful hints they had to give.

Note: Submissions have been edited for clarity and length.

DARRELL S.

“If you are feeling helpless, help someone.”

BIANCA D.

“Hindi ka lang dapat tutulong ‘pag may sobra ka.”

COSTA T.

“Don’t sleep with your makeup on!”

COSTA T.

“Make sure to have a lot of patience deposited in your ‘Emotion Account’. You’ll need it when you get older.

LAUREN L.
“Crying isn’t always a sign of weakness.”

MIRIAM V.
“When you make a commitment, you must fulfill and deliver. So be careful with your ‘yes’.”

REGINA A.
Kung ano ang sinimulan mo, tapusin mo. And when you feel like giving up, don’t quit. Pray for strength.”

NICOLE L.

“Instead of cursing them, pray blessings over people who have hurt you.”

ISOBEL H. 
“Be prepared! When going on a barkada trip, don’t forget to bring formal wear (you might be invited for a sit-down dinner) and swim wear (even if it’s not on the agenda).”

COTTIE D.R.

“Huwag sumabat sa usapan ng matatanda.”

LIRA T.
“Makipagtalo ka na sa akin, huwag lang sa biyenan mo dahil mas maiintindihan kita!”

NANETTE C.
“Find time to volunteer in a local clinic for indigent people. Share the blessings God has given you.”

MHALYN R.
“Lahat ng sobra ay masama.”

MITZI O.
“Mag-aral ng mabuti para makatapos kayo at magtulungan kayong magkakapatid.”

LAARNI B.
Do no harm, but take no sh*t.

XYZA G.

“Always pray, especially when you find it hard to do so. Just surrender everything to God.”

ANTON V.
“Piliin mo mga kaibigan mo.”

JESIELYN M.
“Huwag na huwag kang mangungutang ng hindi mo kayang bayaran. Masarap ang tulog ng taong hindi nakakaagrabyado.”

DANA J.
“Love yourself.”

NINA G.
“Always be responsible & accountable for your actions, no matter what the outcome.”

VIRGIE R.
Maging open sa kanya tungkol sa lovelife mo. Pati siya kinikilig!

EMERALD A.

“It’s better to be kind than to be right.”

EMERALD A.
It was more warning than advice: “Huwag na huwag kang magsisinungaling dahil bago ako magtanong, alam ko na ang sagot!”

JASPER B.
“You need to be deaf, blind, and very giving when it comes to your in-laws.”

REI T.
“Huwag muna magpapakasal dahil mahal ang dolyar!”

LALAINE M.
“Magtira ka, anak, ng para sa iyo.”

JENG M.
Whenever any of us leave the house without her, she always tells us “Huwag kang tatanga-tanga!”

KRIXIE V.

“No matter where you are, no matter what you do, we’ll always be here supporting you. So go and spread your wings and fly with the one you’re meant to be. We’ll see you on the other side of the world.”

MARC G.
“Smile. It adds years to your life and the lives of those you show your smile to.”

MAAN E.
“Naiakyat na namin kayo ng isang hakbang sa hagdan, nasa inyo na yan kung babalik pa ayo sa unang baitang!”

CYRUS L.
“Look with your eyes, not with your mouth!”

STELLA M.
It wasn’t so much what she told me but what I saw in her: grace & dignity in the worst of times, elegance and generosity in the best of times.

MI K.

“There is greater joy in giving and helping, much greater than in receiving.”

She didn’t really say this, but did so through her actions.

There was a flood in their village, and for the first time, water entered the house knee deep. At that time, my parents had a Japanese house guest, a very good family friend. When the water receeded, they swept the house, moved furniture, etc to get it as neat as possible. Right after that, without sitting down to take a break, she immediately got two huge pots and started cooking arroz caldo.

Their Japanese guest, puzzled, asked why she was cooking so much food. My mom replied that, for the first time, water entered her house: which meant that the houses at the lower areas of the village were definitely in much deeper flood. The residents would most likely take shelter at the church, which is on a higher portion of the village. “They’ll be wet and hungry, so I’m cooking for them.” Our Japanese friend had tears rolling down when he heard her reply.

There is greater joy in giving and helping, much greater than in receiving.

Less Fear, More Hope

Written by Niki Guloy

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2015 Quality Index Overall Scores

RANK COUNTRY SCORE
1 UK 93.9
2 Australia 91.6
3 New Zealand 87.6
….
78 Philippines 15.3
79 Bangladesh 14.1
80 Iraq 12.5

In a 2015 quality of death study, the Philippines was named as the third worst place to die out of 80 countries, next to Iraq and Bangladesh.

Lack of awareness and training in relevant health care – along with insufficient national policy & medical bill subsidies – are some reasons why our country ranks so low.

These are also the reasons why The Ruth Foundation team works hard to improve the Filipino perspective on dying.

The truth is, palliative is not about dying a good death, but living the best life possible until the inevitable comes.

It is about time we talk about death with less fear and more hope.